During a staff meeting the other day, one of the counselors mentioned that a client's sponsor had been giving him advice about his treatment.
I immediately interjected with a comment about the role of a sponsor. My advice is that a sponsor/sponsee relationship should be confined to issues related directly to recovery as outlined in the 12 steps.
I hear of sponsors giving advice advice about finances, health issues, marital issues and on and on. I was taught, and my understanding is, that a sponsor should be an advisor-friend who helps a sponsee to navigate the 12 steps.
While it may sometimes be difficult to focus strictly on the steps and recovery, not doing so can lead to bad outcomes.
A number of years ago a sponsor in Chandler gave advice to a sponsee about his depression medication. He told the sponsee that all he needed was the 12 steps, that the depression medication was merely a crutch. The sponsee followed his advice and quit the medication. However, a while later he committed suicide. This is an extreme example of what can happen when sponsors get into areas beyond recovery.
When dealing with my own sponsees I let them know that whatever advice I give is only my opinion. I also share with them how I stay clean and sober.
The idea that because I’ve been sober longer than someone else gives me expertise in other areas is a fallacy. All I have to share is how I dealt with my own issues over the past twenty-two years.
