Recovery Connections

John Schwary is CEO of Transitional Living Communities, an 850-bed recovery program he founded in Mesa, Arizona January 9, 1992, when he had a year sober. He's in his 28th year of recovery.

In these posts, he views life mostly through the lenses of recovery. While the blog is factual, he often disguises events and people to protect anonymity.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Partners who Relapse

As a recovering addict, what do you do if your life partner starts using again?

Do you leave? Get divorced? Give them a chance? Do you ask them to leave?

These are difficult questions. Yet couples in recovery face this issue all the time.

One partner is maybe not as committed as the other to recovery, then slides back into using.

There are no easy answers. And there's a lot of potential for conflict.

After all, there may be children involved. Or perhaps there's jointly owned property or vehicles. A couple may work for the same company. There are as many scenarios as there are people involved.

But there are lines no one should cross.

One of those is if there's any danger to children.

The other is if our partner's using threatens our own recovery.

After all, our most precious gifts are the sanctity of our families - and our hard won recovery.

Our relationship to anyone who poses a threat to these treasures has to be re-evaluated.