Recovery Connections

John Schwary is CEO of Transitional Living Communities, an 850-bed recovery program he founded in Mesa, Arizona January 9, 1992, when he had a year sober. He's in his 28th year of recovery.

In these posts, he views life mostly through the lenses of recovery. While the blog is factual, he often disguises events and people to protect anonymity.

Friday, December 11, 2015

Saying No

Sometimes it hard to say no. And I'm one of the worst when it comes to refusing a request.

But reality is that we only have so much time in a day. We only have so many resources to expend. And to do the most good we must use our time resources wisely.

After several years I finally figured when to say yes, how to figure out what's a priority. And what's not.

And, of course, the top of the list is anything about recovery. If someone can convince me that what they need will help their recovery they usually get it.

Maybe they need a bus pass. Perhaps a clothing voucher. They might want dental work. Help with a GED. Maybe even a trip to visit a sick relative. Most of the time we can accommodate these requests. Especially the if they've been with us for a while.

The requests we don' t normally grant are for personal loans for more than a few dollars. Because usually requests for larger amounts are for non-critical things like the payment of fines or bills. Most of these problems must be worked on as a part of recovery.

And it's good that they're not easy to solve because it reminds us of how our addictions have ripped up our lives.

There's a time to help.  And a time to draw a line.