When it came the client's turn to share, he started telling the group about where he was in his life today.

"I look around me," he said, "and I realize that I'm not really where I want to be at this point of my life." He went on to lament how others have much more than he did. They had great jobs. They had careers. They had families. He was pretty down on himself about where he was in his life compared to others of his age, education, and background.

"There's more than one way to look at your situation," interjected another group member. "If you were thinking positively, you could just as easily find your situation to be a lot better than those who don't have as much of you do."

Others in the group pointed out the same thing. They made the point that the man just should change his perspective. He could look to others and say, "everyone has a lot more than I do." Or, he could say, "why I'm fortunate that I'm not in that wheelchair. Or, that I'm not homeless. Or that I live in the United States of America where opportunity abounds."

The group morphed into a session about gratitude and looking at the many blessings we have in our lives. Although it's not unique to alcoholics and addicts, those of us in recovery sometimes focus on what we don't have. When I hear someone in a group or meeting who talks about how grateful they are for what's going on in their lives I recognize that this is a person who's been around for a while. This person has spent some time in recovery and realizes what's important in life.

There's probably not a person on the planet who can't play the comparison game, in either a positive or negative way. I once knew a man who was homeless who thought life was really great because he had a special spot in a desert wash that he could call his own. He felt that his life was a lot better than those who lived in an alley or on a sidewalk. I also went to school with a spoiled rich kid who'd received the gift of a new car but was upset because on of his rich kid friends had been given a car that was a little pricier.

It's all a matter of perspective.