One sure way is to want things to be different than they are at the present moment. Our ego may demand that people treat us differently than they do. We may think we're more important than we really are. And when we want people to treat us this way and they don't do it we can be very unhappy.
A long time ago I heard the real secret of happiness: never take things personally. Even though it seems like most of life's about us and our needs and our wants and desires if we live this way we're going to find ourselves constantly disappointed and frustrated and out of sync with the world.
When I live this way – not taking things personally – I'm a pretty happy camper. Because what others say, do, or think doesn't have a lot to do with me.
At times they just want someone to listen. There are others who are large and bullying personalities who want to be the center of attention. Or who always want to be right about everything even though they usually fall short.
If we do what we learn in the 12-step programs and accept people as they are, we rarely get into difficulty. Because no matter what our opinion of what they say, it doesn't make a hill of beans in the scheme of things. Their opinion is their opinion and I let them keep it and express it as often as they want. In other words, I don't take it personally because it's not about me.
I guarantee that if you try living this way, not taking things personally and allowing other people to express themselves you're going to be much happier. And you'll be more at peace.
And isn't that what we all got sober for?
Click here to email John
When I live this way – not taking things personally – I'm a pretty happy camper. Because what others say, do, or think doesn't have a lot to do with me.
At times they just want someone to listen. There are others who are large and bullying personalities who want to be the center of attention. Or who always want to be right about everything even though they usually fall short.
If we do what we learn in the 12-step programs and accept people as they are, we rarely get into difficulty. Because no matter what our opinion of what they say, it doesn't make a hill of beans in the scheme of things. Their opinion is their opinion and I let them keep it and express it as often as they want. In other words, I don't take it personally because it's not about me.
I guarantee that if you try living this way, not taking things personally and allowing other people to express themselves you're going to be much happier. And you'll be more at peace.
And isn't that what we all got sober for?
Click here to email John
