Wednesday, May 12, 2021

Anger Management

I had a chance to practice anger management yesterday - one of the few times I’ve had to use that part of my recovery education in a real life situation.  And the interesting thing is that l’d done nothing at all to inspire the other person’s anger.

The incident happened when I was filling my vehicle at a local Circle K gas pump in Mesa.  Just as I was fastening my seat belt after getting back into my Polaris Slingshot I noticed a vehicle that had pulled parallel to me on the passenger side of my vehicle when the driver blew her horn.

Thinking the driver wanted to speak to me, or ask a question, I waited until she lowered her window and asked if I could help her.

“Yeah,” she screamed out the window.  “You can get the f... out of my way, I’m almost out of gas.”

My daughter, an army veteran who can deadlift 250 pounds and who’s a veteran of over 30 street fights and has military combat training calmly replied that we would take as much time as we needed.  That when we were done we would leave, which we were starting to do when she arrived. 

Our calm replies seemed to enrage her even more and she began screaming racial slurs about white people.   

When I suggested she calm down, she became even angrier and louder and we both realized that trying to talk to her was fruitless.

The interesting part to me was that I was able to remain completely calm and unruffled. I attribute that to over 30 years of recovery, 10 years of daily meditation and all the sessions I spent counseling other recovering addicts and alcoholics.

And as I drove away I even found myself having some compassion for a person who was so frustrated that they had to scream at people in a public place over what they perceived to be a serious problem.

Recovery can help improve your life in more ways than you know.

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