Today, exactly one year later, I'm here on a one-week vacation with my oldest daughter, enjoying a much-needed vacation after several months of costly dealings with attorneys and lawsuits related to my impending divorce.
And I say "much-needed" because since last February 28 life has had its challenges. The evening of February 28 is when my soon-to-be ex-wife grabbed a large butcher knife and went after my daughter for reasons that aren't clear to me or my daughter. The whole event was over in less than 30 seconds and ended with my wife in jail on domestic violence charges and my daughter and I both traumatized. It was a miracle from God that no one was killed that evening.
I got a restraining order against her the next morning and filed for divorce within days.
For several months after my wife's release from jail, we tried to work out ways of reconciling. We tried a legal separation, and in pursuit of that I shortsightedly purchased a newly rehabilitated house in my area for her to live in – a house that she selected. I filled it with new furniture and appliances and had custom blinds installed. I paid all the expenses and provided her with an allowance. I paid off her credit cards. But somehow it didn't work out.
Things really started declining when I asked her to sign a disclaimer for a company refinancing loan that I have been working on for about six weeks. For some reason, she had the idea that one of the largest banks in Arizona, a bank that had about $13 billion in assets, was out to defraud her. And she refused to sign the document - essentially stopping the loan from proceeding.
That kind of did it for me. And I was quite angry for a short while. Later, I realize that I probably shouldn't be angry at her. After all, the same thinking processes that allowed her to go after my daughter were probably also involved in her deciding to not help me with the loan.
The weekend after the loan fiasco she abandoned the house, stripping it of its furnishings. After that, we dated sporadically, but things never really got back on track. Then July 16 – when we were supposed to see each other – she sent a text saying she could no longer "do this." I agreed, and blocked her from my phone and haven't spoken to her since.
It was a good decision on my part. While I occasionally look back in regret, more and more I come to realize that I have peace and serenity in my life that I haven't enjoyed in a long time. We're supposed to go to trial February 28 to finalize the divorce. But I'm prepared, if necessary, for this thing to drag on for another year or two. Whatever happens, it's going to happen when it's supposed to.
Arizona law is very clear about the division of assets acquired during a marriage: 50-50. It makes little difference to me whether it happens next year or the year after.
