While watching Fox news recently I saw a story that touched my heart. It was a story about a police officer who had been paralyzed for 25 years from a gunshot wound he had suffered while on duty in New York City. Appearing on the show with him was his wife and 26 year old son. The host of the show explained that after the officer was shot by his assailant, a young African-American man, he was able to forgive him. He even went on to become his mentor.

The commentator told us that the son was joining the New York Police department. In fact the son had already completed the police academy and was accepted as an officer. The commentator asked the father, a medal of honor winner, what he thought about his son's choice of career. The father explained, while breathing heavily with the help of a oxygen machine, that he respected his son's decision. He said that he lived without fear, and trusted God to protect his son.

Because many of us in recovery have such difficulty dealing with anger and resentments people like this paralyzed police officer amaze me. In my mind, he is a living saint.

I believe it is the essence of spirituality when we forgive. It doesn't make any difference whether the wrong is real or perceived. In the case of the police officer it was a real wrong. But for me, and many alcoholics and addicts that I know, our wrongs don't have to be real. I can imagine that someone has wronged me. Even though it is imaginary I can still carry a resentment against them.

I once heard someone say something profound about resentments in an AA meeting. He said that having a resentment against someone is like taking a deadly poison and waiting for the other person to die. And it is true. We sometimes carry this seed of anger, this seething resentment that eats at our guts.

This is a deadly state for those of us in recovery.