Most do well as long as they're on a restricted program, where the only thing they do is work, go to 12 step meetings, and attend house meetings. Our rule is that if someone has been in the program three times, without success, then they enter our hard six program. The first time they're in that program they're restricted to the property for six months. The second time they leave and come back they're on restriction for 12 months. And the third time it could be as long as 18 months.
You might ask why we keep taking them back after so many relapses?
We changed our policy when we had a bad experience about 20 years ago after we told a man that he could no longer return because he'd been here too many times – that we were unable to help him. Within a week after we turned him away he was found on a sidewalk in Phoenix, dead from alcohol poisoning. Over the years we've had a number of alcoholics relapse, disappear, and be found dead somewhere from drinking. One was found in a field in Apache Junction, surrounded by empty liquor bottles. A few years ago another man was found in an empty lot in Phoenix after drinking himself to death.
We had a man this week disappear after being sober for nearly 4 years – the longest time he'd accumulated in the past 15 years or so. He started out in our program in Las Vegas, and eventually transferred to Phoenix. He has a pattern of staying sober a while, getting off restriction, doing well for a few months and then picking up a bottle and starting off on another run. The last time we found him and took him back into the program, he was close to death. Within a few years he got his driver's license back. He'd worked his way off restriction. He'd purchased a vehicle and a supply of tools. He was chairing meetings and appeared to be working a strong program. Then all of a sudden he's nowhere to be found. Three empty vodka bottles were in the trash at the property where he lived. And it was obvious what had happened.
And if he survives this drinking binge I know we'll take him back. Because the alternative isn't good. If we turn them away he'll continue to drink until he either has a seizure, gets killed in an accident, or dies of alcohol poisoning. And when things like that happen it's devastating because people who have been with us so long become almost like members of our family.
The only thing we can do is our part: be here for those who are willing to trying get sober one more time.
Click here to email John
