I have a female relative who is beautiful, intelligent and talented who makes her living in the music world. Yet, in spite of all her talent and gifts she has never succeeded with her long term relationshionships. She does quite well financially - but when it comes to dealing with other people she's an abject failure.
And when I say relationships I don't mean with just some people - she doesn't get along with anyone for very long. Anytime she has a problem with someone she blames them. Her primary target is her mother. And no matter what goes wrong she somehow ties it to the way her she was raised.
But, the interesting thing is that she was raised very well. She was dressed well, she was sent to decent schools and lived in nice enough neighborhoods. Her mother always put her welfare first and made sure she had the best she could afford to give her. Yet, even now, she behaves the same way she did as a child.
No matter what setbacks she has, they're are someone else's fault.
I bring this up today as a topic because, even though she's not an addict she displays many of the characteristics of a addict.
Before I got sober all of the bad things that happened in my life I blamed on others. My life changed when I looked in the mirror and said there's the problem. I was the author of my own misery, the creator of my problems.
And the interestng thing is that once I took that stance, accepted that I was responsbile, my whole life changed. If you're an an addict and you're looking outside yourself as the problem, then you'll never get sober and start living a normal life.
If you don't believe me, try it.
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