Doing too Much

We deal with many angry young clients who blame their parents for doing too much.

     “My parents did everything for me.”

     “They never taught me to be responsible.”

     “They bought me off with money and cars.”

And the level of anger from some of these clients is astonishing. If the parents had any idea of what their largesse would do to the relationship I’m sure they would have saved the money.

These offspring often end up with us when the parents tire of the stream of money flowing from their bank accounts to drug dealers. And then the anger from the kids follows.

However, as clients become successful in their sobriety, they also begin to learn what they should have learned at home from their parents.

We sometimes have to start at ground zero. And that means we have to teach them personal care like making their own bed, cleaning their living areas and bathrooms, and budgeting their money. Many of them don’t know how to apply for a job, turn on utilities, or apply for a license – many of the fundamentals of daily living.

As parents our job is teach our children take care of themselves. If we buy them off we sometimes doom them to a questionable future - one that includes addictions.