It kind of happened like this. I had joined a new fitness center a couple of miles from my house. And quite often, when I'd show up at four in the morning, I'd encounter a fellow there who was quite friendly. We would nod and speak. A couple of times I ran into him at a pharmacy in the neighborhood.
Eventually we started addressing each other by name. Sometimes we'd make small talk during our workouts. But that was about it.
Then one day, as I was driving away from my house I noticed this same guy standing in front of a house two doors from mine. He nodded and waved, and so did I.
Then a sudden realization came over me. The house was the home of a registered sex offender who had moved into our neighborhood about six months earlier. To be sure, I looked on the Internet and confirmed it. This was the same guy whose mug shot I'd seen on a flyer that came to our house when he first moved to the neighborhood.
After that, when I'd see him at the gym I'd do my best to avoid him. But that wasn't always possible. Once he invited me and my wife to have a beer and see the renovations he'd made to his patio. I mumbled something about us not drinking and not being too social and left it at that. Eventually I changed my schedule and started working out at a different time and never ran into him again.
Because I came from a prison subculture where people like him suffered a lot, I have a visceral reaction when I encounter people like him. Plus, I'm a grandparent with six grandchildren that I'm quite protective of.
But sometimes in situations like this I wonder where my love and tolerance is. Then I realize that at times life puts us in situations where our codes of behavior are difficult to apply.
