I received this email yesterday from a client's mother and thought these excerpts were worth sharing. Names have been left out to protect anonymity.
"I've written one other time and wanted to respond to the July 2nd blog post.
I read them all and I think TLC is amazing. You get it right. I get texts from my daughter and she is using language like "earning privileges" and "taking more responsibility". EXACTLY what she has needed to do her entire adult life.
Up to June 7 she was very much a 16 year old trapped in a 32 year old life. And I think she went off to TLC with the attitude of "doing her time". In just a few weeks EVERYTHING has changed. She texts about knowing her triggers and recognizing her anger and changing her responses.
Most importantly, she has found community - loving, accepting community. Not without its expectations for sure. But she is learning something she has so needed to learn for a long long time. She is learning how to be in relationships. She is learning about integrity. And she has a routine that keeps her engaged all day every day in purposeful, meaningful work. She is making a contribution and she seems to feel valued and appreciated.
In one of her first texts she asked me to send snacks because the food was "prison slop". I texted back that if she was unhappy she should volunteer to help in the kitchen. Today, she is head chef supervising 2 others and preparing 3 meals a day for 62 people.
I'm so proud of her for finally seeing her worth and putting her vast intelligence and creativity to productive use in the TLC community. I so hope she puts down roots and stays in Mesa because I don't think there's anything close to what she has there in NH.
Your structure and process is perfect for the addictive personality. I see such changes in her every time I hear from her. So, from one very satisfied family member, THANK YOU for everything you are doing to give addicts a road map to a happy life. It's a huge relief that my daughter is opening herself to a life of sobriety. I know it's a challenging road ahead for her and there may be lapses but she is gaining strengths and insights that will carry her through the hard times and for that I am grateful.
The other thing I appreciate is that she is the responsible party here. For too long I have stepped in and paid the consequences, fines, etc. for her actions believing each time was the last time. I am grateful that she is being held fully accountable and I can be a supportive bystander cheering her on.
I just wanted you to know all the things I appreciate about TLC and all you have done to create a model that really works."
This mother describes perfectly what TLC is about. We're grateful that she took the time to write this.
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