I stopped for coffee at a nearby Circle K on my way to work yesterday. And there, off to the side of the store in an alcove sat a disheveled man with a beat-up bicycle leaned against the wall beside him. He had a small bag with him, probably containing clothing.
I'd seen him several times before, usually on the other side of the store. I think he changes locations to stay in the shade.
Each time I see him I automatically wonder how much money he'll ask me for.
Usually panhandlers use the line "Do you have any loose change you can spare?" And my response is always the same. I'll hand them a dollar or two on my way back to the car once I get my coffee.
But this guy is different. He just gives a pleasant hello and smile and never asks for anything. So I never offer him anything. I'm not sure why because he looks like he's down on his luck and maybe hasn't bathed in a few days. But rather than risk offending him, I say nothing, just reply when he speaks.
As I drove away I thought about this guy and my chattering brain started taking his inventory. Why doesn't he get a job? Is he an alcoholic? Maybe he's crazy. That's what my busy brain does sometimes - with no prodding from me.
However I was able to turn it into an opportunity to practice compassion - to look at him differently.
Maybe he had a tragedy in his life. He could be a veteran with PTSD. Maybe he was physically or mentally ill. After all, there aren't a lot of reasons I can think of why someone would be living as he appeared to be.
So instead of criticizing or evaluating him, I sent him good wishes. Hoped that an opportunity would come along that would improve his life.
And as I drove on I felt a little more gratitude for my own circumstances.
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