At a 12-step meditation meeting I attended last night in Scottsdale I listened to an older gentleman describe the problems he's going through now that he's retired.
He said his life is sort of "aimless," that he feels he has no purpose since he left the job he worked at for 28 years. He seemed quite depressed and didn't know what he was going to do.
This is a classic issue with people who strongly identify themselves with their employment. The job gives them a reason for being, a reason for getting out of bed in the morning. And it's a talking point when they're socializing with others. Their life story and identity are built around the job.
But we are so much more than a job, even though we may spend a third of our day working. We are a father, mother, brother, sister, church member, sports fan, and so on. We have so many identities outside of what we do. Yet usually when two men meet the first thing they learn about each other is what they "do." As if what they "do" is who they are.
In other words they are "human doings" rather than "human beings."
My belief is that we must look at the many aspects of our lives and learn to appreciate the other
aspects of who we are. And not identify just with our job.
This gentleman needs to find new interests. Maybe take up a hobby. Or volunteer at a homeless shelter or hospice. Join a gym or book club. Go hiking. If he stops clinging to the identity he had while on his job he may find a new mission for his life.
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