The young man, in his early 20s, was suffering from cystic fibrosis. He'd known since his early teens that he probably wouldn't live past age 27. He had a sister who had succumbed to the same disease at around age 18. Yet he spent over a year at the TLC Treatment Clinic, dealing with his heroin addiction and succeeded in staying clean during his time with us. For many of us, he showed a great deal of courage by staying clean even though he knew he was not going to be around very long. As a longtime heroin addict, even though I've been clean for nearly 27 years, I'm not sure I'd be able to stay clean if I knew I had a terminal disease and not long to be around.
I learned a great deal from this young man about life, death, and acceptance. For one thing, he always had a smile on his face and he never whined about anything. In some of our sessions, we discussed things that were important to him, about his desire to stay clean and sober in spite of his condition. Other times he would talk about how much he missed his family, his friends, and his dog.
Every once in a while his lung condition would overwhelm him and he'd end up in the hospital for 2 to 3 weeks. Before I'd visit I would ask if he wanted me to bring him anything and he always did. It might be a book or magazine but his list also included 1 to 2 rotisserie chickens from a local supermarket. Even though he was forbidden to have food like that I always got it for him because neither of us could see much harm in this small indulgence. And on each occasion, he would eat most of a chicken during our visit in spite of the fact that he only weighed about 130 pounds.
Each time I had a counseling session with him it boosted my gratitude level. Not only that, his quiet acceptance of his circumstances is something I'd use when I dealt with other clients. They realized that they didn't have much to complain about when they looked at the equanimity with which he dealt with his disease.
I don't think Kurt ever realized how much he gave back to the addiction community by the example he gave us in the last months of his life. I still miss his quiet acceptance and pleasant smile.
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