She says she lost her older son to a heroin overdose about a year ago. She says that her son has never done as well as he has in our program. And she doesn't want him to leave.
I explain that I didn't discharge him. That he decided to leave because we were going to transfer him to another house due to his ongoing involvement with female clients. I tell her of his being disciplined more than twice for sexually inappropriate behavior with female clients. Plus other infractions of the rules.
I feel her anxiety and really wanted to grant her wishes. But my primary responsibility to the program is to protect the clients from inappropriate behavior.
This incident illustrates what I talk a lot about in this blog: how our disease and addiction affects our families and those around us. This client lives a self-centered life, not caring about the effect he’ll have on others. At least not enough to change his behavior.
It says in the recovery literature that "selfishness and self-centeredness we think is the root of our problem." And in this client's case he's demonstrated over and over again that all he cares about is his own self-gratification.
Hopefully he’ll discover that he's responsible for his behavior – and the consequences of that behavior.
We wish him well.
