Sunday, May 8, 2022

Mother's Day Lesson

I was at a 12-step meeting this morning and the topic was "acceptance."

There was a young woman who had chosen the topic.  She explained, with tears in her eyes, that one of the reasons she picked the topic is because Child Protective Services had taken custody of her children.  And the only way she could get them back was to go to treatment and deal with her addiction.  The CPS was making her prove that she could stay clean and sober and provide a home for her children.

We could all see that she was in pain, that she missed her children very much.

But one person at the meeting suggested that she might look at the situation from a different angle, which might make her feel better about the separation from her children.  After all, she could feel sorry about the separation and remain in pain.  Or she could look at the separation as an opportunity for her to work through the issues that led her into drugs and alcohol.

After all, how often do we get to be in a situation where we can totally focus on our addictions without the distraction of raising children and feeding our habits?

As we get older and gain more experience, we also learn that we can learn from the negative experiences in our lives.  And if we do learn from our experiences we may not repeat them.

After all, we probably learn more from pain of our bad choices than we realize.  For example we don't touch a hot stove after we get burned the first time we do it.  Pain directs us to make better decisions.

I know the pain of my heroin and alcohol use were great teachers.  Because I haven't used either of them in 30 years.  So I know that I learned the lesson well.

If we change our perspective we can often change our lives.

It worked for me.

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