My life began changing the moment I took responsibility for my addiction and decided to do something about it.
I remember that I was sitting at a bus stop January 13, 1991, looking at the path my life was on. I was addicted to heroin and alcohol. I was homeless. I was having to steal every day to take care of myself and my drug habit. All I had was the clothes I was wearing and less than a dollar in change.
I was having this conversation with myself, trying to decide what I was going to do. I knew that if I chose to keep using, I'd either go back to jail, prison, the mental hospital, or maybe even the cemetery. A different choice I could make would be to go to a detox and get on a path to recovery, something I'd never done.
The only way I ever stopped using was if I'd gotten arrested and went through withdrawals on a jailhouse floor. But my pattern was always the same: as soon as I was released I'd immediately steal something to drink, then steal something else so I could buy some drugs. That was my pattern, whether I was in jail for an hour or for several years.
Having never gotten sober or clean voluntarily, I opted to go to detox and get into recovery. At that moment I became responsible. And that's when everything changed for me.
Once we take responsibility for what happens to us things can become different. Today they are.
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