I often tell clients that we're not going to work harder than they are on their recovery. But, in reality, we often work much harder than some of them in an effort to help them change.
This sometimes happens in the case of older clients, who are much more entrenched in their addictions and lifestyles.
I'm thinking of one in particular, a man who enjoyed a successful career in the military. Then he went on to work for years with a utility company. When he came to us he was covered by insurance and had three sources of income between retirement and Social Security. And on top of that he had a healthy stock portfolio. Money wasn't his issue.
His issue was alcoholic drinking. Plus he had so many medical and psychological issues that he was taking over 20 medications when he came to us. In addition, he was and is a heavy smoker. So what to do with a guy like this?
We've attempted to get him involved with 12-step programs and to have him work with a sponsor. We haven't had much luck with this.
Of course we always have the option of discharging him. The problem is that he says he wants our help. Yet he seems incapable of following our suggestions. He has no interest in quitting smoking. He has no interest in getting fit so he can fight off his health issues. He's understandably depressed and frustrated with his condition. But not frustrated enough to make even small changes.
He's been under the care of so many doctors over the years, and has been prescribed such a variety of medications, that he seems to believe that if he just finds the right combination he’ll be okay. Without sounding negative, I doubt this will happen.
So when do we stop working with this guy? It's hard to know. Maybe tomorrow we'll say something to him that’ll catapult him into recovery.
Hopefully we won’t run out of patience before that happens.
Comments? schwary@msn.com
