One thing that many people have a hard a time with is that they believe they're the center of attention.
For example, I know this man in his 20s who was arrested about a year ago and was released from jail after he posted bond and agreed to wear an ankle bracelet and report to a probation officer. He was pretty happy to get released. But, he was very unhappy about the ankle bracelet.
When I questioned him about it, he told me that he hated it because he could no longer wear shorts when he went to the gym or played basketball.
When I asked him why he couldn't wear shorts, he said that people would see the ankle bracelet and know that he'd been in trouble with the law.
Of course my response was why does he care what others think? And does he have skills with extrasensory perception that allows him to read what others have on their minds? I asked why he would waste his precious time on this planet wondering what others might think about him?
I believe we should respect social norms and care what others think as far as our behaviour is concerned. I think we should care enough about what others think to to treat them with respect and politeness. We get ahead in the world by observing social norms and standards.
But to let others control our behavior because we might be afraid of what they think of us is a whole different story. When we're born we have about 4000 weeks to live. So why should we be renting headspace to people we don't even know and might only see once; for example at a gym.
He and I have discussed the ankle bracelet issue more than once. But I think his ego is not yet developed enough for him to accept that what other people might think is mostly irrelevant. Someday he hopefully will find a better use of his time.
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