Anger gets us Drunk

At least once or twice a year someone threatens to sue us.  A couple of days ago a client became angry at a counselor and packed his stuff and walked out.  On his way out he talked one of his friends into leaving with him.  Later that day he called back - drunk and angry - and told the person who answered the phone that he was filing a lawsuit against TLC.

Now this is nothing new to us.  We have alcoholics and addicts who get angry and leave the program every once in a while.  And - especially if they're drunk - they'll say they're going to sue us for god knows what.  But that rarely happens.  If they do go as far as to contact an attorney they soon learn that it takes thousands of dollars just to  get started and they drop that idea and continue getting high or drunk until they find out that maybe they acted a little hastily.  We rarely hear from them again.

But this anecdote brings up a problem that's at the core of alcoholism and addictions.  And that problem  is anger and resentment.  Many of us - me included - get drunk for years because we're angry and resentful at something that didn't go our way.

Now I'm not saying we shouldn't get angry at others or at situations that didn't go our way.  But most of the things we get angry about about are things that are out of our control.  Or, they're about things that are no  longer important or relevant to our lives today.

I'm a good example of that.  I was abused by my father for years.  And once I got into my teens I ran away from home and never went back.  All I did was live for years as an addict and alcoholic because I was so angry I was unable to mask the pain without drugs.

While I turned out fairly successful in life, how many years did I waste on anger at my alcoholic father?  Quite a few.  I spent a lot of time in prisons, jails, on the streets and in other bad situations all because I couldn't learn to forgive.

I know that if we survive our anger we may become stronger human beings - but wouldn't it be better if we could immediately realize that our anger will accomplish nothing and just forgive and move on.  After all, does it really matter if we're right or wrong?

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