The Karma of Kindness

When I mentioned to a friend at a meeting that I'd purchased roses for my wife on the way home from the gym that morning he asked why.

"Was it her birthday?" he asked

 "No," I replied. "It was one of those “just because' kind of things I do for her every so often."

I could tell he was having a hard time fitting it into his head – the idea of giving a spontaneous gift to my wife on other than a birthday or special occasion.

During my 21 years’ sober I’ve learned that most everyone responds well to kindness and love.  In the case of my wife, she appreciates that I thought of her at 5:30 in the morning. And her reaction when she walks into the kitchen and sees the arrangement is always perfect.

While what I get in return is something I seldom think of, I’ve had some interesting responses when I’ve been kind. I once helped someone I cared about get back on their feet after they suffered a series of financial and legal challenges. 

It took a few years and some inconvenience and expense on my part, but because I wanted to help, I did what I could until the person jumped back into the mainstream. After that, we kind of lost contact the way busy people do. However, a few years later I ran into this person in another city and was given a surprise - a business idea I’d never considered. This person could have given the opportunity to others, but somehow it ended up with me. Coincidence?

I once had an older relative who was close to my mother. No one much liked her because she was cranky and difficult. But because my mother cared for her I made the effort to stay in touch with her and her husband after my mother passed. Once or twice a year I’d visit.  A phone call now and then.  At Christmas I’d remember them.  Nothing big - only small kindnesses.  I was surprised to learn after they passed on that they’d left me their home and a considerable amount of money.  

But the best thing about people returning kindness is I don’t expect it.  It’s nice when it happens, but the real thing about giving is what it does to my heart and my spirit.