How'd that Work Out?

For the past few weeks a client had been saying he wanted to get high. And - although several of us suggested that wouldn't be the best idea - he finally went out anyway.

At the time we realized he was reaching out, that he was trying to get us to provide a good reason to not to pick up. However, he finally made the move and smoked meth with a former resident who'd left a month earlier.

For a few days after he left we'd get text messages saying he wanted to go to a detox.  And when we would offer to give him a ride he’d promise to call back. We finally did connect with him and help him get into a hospital.

This client's situation is not at all unusual. Often times newcomers want to get high. And many do just that. And some of them don't return so we never hear what happened to them. And there are others who realize that they did something that wasn't in their best interests. So they stay touch with the managers and other friends in the program - perhaps hoping that they will be able to return.

But the addicts who do return never give glowing reports of their using experiences. It’s always a story of how bad they felt about relapsing.  About guilt.  About letting others down.  About feeling demoralized. About having to start over.