I was thinking of this today when a mother called about one of her sons, a man I've known since I first got sober. In fact I met them about the same time.
Her son has been struggling for well over 20 years with alcohol and pills. And his mother is still making up reasons about why he can't stop. She has trouble placing the responsibility where it belongs - on him.
This is a pattern I've observed most of my sober life. People either get tired of listening to our excuses and cut us loose - or we change. It's not always that clear cut. But that's a common pattern.
It took until my 4os before people stopped listening to my stories and quit helping me. They let me know that I was responsible for myself. And some of them were kind of mean about it. But it worked.
Once I began looking at myself, things changed rapidly. Within a year I was working full time and starting my own business. Life has been much smoother ever since.
I just had to look at who was responsible.
