I received a text message yesterday from a friend who'd lost a close relative. He was upset of course, but was reaching out to others in recovery for support. The relative, a cousin, was only 34 years old. His death from natural causes was unexpected and the family was immersed in grief.

Members of the Fellowship reached out to support him. He has several people with whom he communicates regularly, the topic usually being about recovery and living a day at a time. I did my part, telling him to call if he needed to talk.

This incident illustrates what happens over and over in the 12 step programs. Because the Fellowship is a network, a large extended family, members support each other whenever help is needed. It doesn't make any difference what kind of challenges a member of the Fellowship faces. Someone will step up and hold out a hand.

When I lost my aunt in May of 2006, within fifteen minutes there were several people in my living room. I was surrounded by loving friends who were in recovery who understood my vulnerability. It wasn't anything they said that is memorable. It was just that they were there to provide a safety net, emotional support in a time of pain and loss.

This is what we do in the 12 step programs.