Discharge Him?

It can be frustrating when those we're trying to help steal from us. This week a man who’s been with us for more than six months was caught taking $20.00 from our store.

He came to us with nothing. His family had given up. He drank and did drugs for over thirty years. He has no marketable skills and has health issues.  On top of this resume, he’s been a difficult client while with TLC.  In fact, he had so much trouble finding work that we finally hired him ourselves because the only thing he’s doing right is to not drink or drug.

But what do we do when someone has been with us this long and still engages in old behavior? Do we discharge him? It’s not an easy decision. But in this man’s case we let him stay. His punishment is to apologize to the house at one of our weekly meetings and to write a paper explaining how stealing helps his sobriety. And to pay back our $20.00.

One factor that worked in this client’s behalf is that we’ve had this experience, sometimes more than once with the same client. A few years back we had a man steal money and our van as he left to relapse. He came back, made amends, and then did it again. The last time he returned, he made amends, and stayed sober. Today he’s the pastor of a large ministry that works with recovering addicts and alcoholics.

Over the past 20 years we’ve had clients steal from us, make amends, then go on to remain sober. In fact, one man who has a cubicle outside my office did something similar. Yet today, he’s been clean for a few years, is raising a new baby and living a different kind of life.

In the literature it says “some are sicker than others.” And I know that was true of many of us. If someone had given up on me each time I screwed up I probably wouldn’t be writing this today.