Seems he's over 50 years old. Currently living with her. Drinking, doing drugs, and raising hell. Not helping her financially.
She wonders what to do. Should she use tough love and tell him to leave?
Those who read this blog know what I wrote back. Yes, throw his ass out. At least she might have peace in her life. Even if he doesn't want to change.
The advice I gave her is the same I give to anyone. If you're supporting someone who doesn't want to change - send them on their way.
And the reason I'm so strong on this issue is that it worked for me. And it's worked for many of those who've been through our program.
When my family told me they'd no longer help me I couldn't believe it. No money. No sofa. No food. No loaning me a car.
At first I thought they were incredibly cruel. Was I even related to these people? Didn't they know I had a substance abuse problem? But they stayed with their decision.
And it was the best thing that ever happened. Because suddenly I had to look at myself - the source of the problem.
Once I started looking at myself as the author of my misery, life changed. And today I'm grateful to them for sending me on my way.
Because that's when my life changed and I found help.
