Sunday, March 8, 2015

Parents call Us

About 90% of the calls we receive, maybe more, are from parents or family members. They're seeking help for their loved ones.

Some of the disembodied voices on my phone seem confused. Others are in fear. They'll say things like "I'm afraid I'm going to find him dead some morning." Or else they think he might end up in jail. Or a hospital.

They'll tell me how successful their child was at one time. Maybe he - or she - was a high school athlete. Or some kind of a scholar. Maybe they're about to lose a wife or husband.

Because most are not alcoholics or addicts they they don't understand. Why would someone continue to do something so destructive? Why would they throw away everything they worked so hard for over a drink or a drug?

And I agree that it doesn't make sense. There's nothing logical about drug addiction or alcoholism. It's a form of insanity that takes over our lives until it either destroys us or else we get sober.

I tell them they should offer to help their loved one get clean and sober. But if they don't accept the help the next move should be to cut them off. Don't enable them any longer.

Let them reach the point where they'll start to realize the seriousness of the situation. And maybe they'll get done quicker.

So many of our clients say they didn't try to get help until their families cut them off. It was a dose of reality that shocked them into doing something.