Thursday, December 8, 2011

Losing Patience...

It's sometimes difficult to decide how much time and energy to invest in a client. If he’s willing to change it's rewarding to help him. But when a client isn't honest with anyone – including himself - it's hard to know how to deal with him.

For example, we have a client who lies about most everything. We suspect him of stealing from us. He has such a long criminal record and so many tattoos that it's nearly impossible for him to get a job. In fact, we have him working for us so he can pay his way and stay close to the program. Even though he has problems recognizing the truth, he says he wants to quit using drugs and going to jail. And probably the only thing he's done right is that he hasn't used in some time. And that’s the only reason he’s still with us.

We've had similar situations with clients who were unable to change. And because we were unable to help them - even after trying for a few years - we ended up discharging them from the program. On some occasions this didn’t work out well. Several years ago a man we discharged died of a heroin overdose hours after he left. Another died from an overdose of alcohol on a Phoenix sidewalk in the middle of the summer- within a week of leaving. While those of us who discharged them felt we did the right thing, we had some afterthoughts about what might have happened if they'd stayed with us longer. We’ll never know.

In the present case we’ll likely give the client a few more weeks in the hope that he’ll finally understand that no one's going to save him – he’ll have to save himself.

Hopefully we’ll have the patience to deal with him until he has a breakthrough of honesty.

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