Saturday, February 13, 2016

Confrontations

I was in a group session yesterday with a group of halfway house residents - ten men who all live in the same house. Another manager and I were invited there to help sort out a few communication issues.

Even now, hours later, I'm not sure what they were bickering about. But it seemed to be mostly about egos and hurt feelings. Because there was little of substance. People hearing what they wanted to hear instead of what was said. Being defensive when there's nothing to defend.

One of the most difficult jobs in our company is halfway house management. Sometimes it's like running an adult day care. Each resident thinking their needs are the most important. Not even considering that they live with seven to ten other men who have needs of their own.

One good thing that came from the meeting was that they were taught how to confront one another. And what they learned was that we can confront another person without being angry.

When we approach another person with an issue we admit our role in whatever the differences are. We express our desire to get along and have peace with the other person. We express our feelings in a non-threatening way.

It's surprising how quickly things work out when we approach the other person that way.

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