Baggage

A recent aftercare discussion turned to self-esteem and how messages from our childhood can plague – or bless - us  throughout our lives.

For example, one man said that the messages he got from his parents was that he was "no good" or "worthless." For most of his life, when opportunities would show up, he didn't feel qualified to take advantage of them. He spent much of his adult life working in mediocre jobs because he didn't feel he could do better.

Conversely, another client was told he was a good artist and he spent much of his career as a successful  entertainer. However, in his case, he was always told he could do better.  As a result he became a perfectionist. And no matter what he did it was never quite good enough.

Many clients come into the program carrying such baggage. While so-called normal people get the same messages, addicts and alcoholics seem  more sensitive to this kind of input when they're young. And the result is that often we turn to substances to override this misinformation.

One thing that came out of group is that there is a solution. We can override these core beliefs by changing our behavior. We can start acting like we're competent and override our negative messages. 

We can start realizing that we deserve success, happiness, and the blessings of a rich life as much as anyone else on the planet.