Unhappy Grandmother

Below are excerpts from an email from an unhappy grandmother who sent her 20 something grandson to TLC from the Midwest to help him get clean. This email is an example of the stories addicts tell when they’re struggling with their recovery.

‘After many tries at getting my grandson help, I came across your article about TLC in Arizona. With several phone conversations with staff at TLC I was reassured that this was a really great place. 

‘Between the two grandmothers we got the money for his ticket and sent him to Arizona.  Now things just are not what they seem. I think it would be a good idea for you to make some surprise visits to the places that these people are calling “home.” 

“I know that you would want to know what is going on. Bed bugs, roaches, and no plumbing.  And what happened to the programs and the staff that was to help with rehab? I know that you would want to know what is going on. We had put a lot of faith in your program and now what we are seeing is not anything like your site on the internet. 

“If you want to help people in need then do that. I hope that this program is not another lets get rich quick scam. If I am wrong about all of this I will apologize and do whatever it takes to make amends. Maybe some of your programs need to be revised to today’s standards.. I don’t think you want anyone living in unhealthy conditions. I hope we can get the help that is needed to this up before it gets out of hand.  There are other things that cold be discussed but I’ll try to take one thing at a time. Thank you.”

I called the grandmother and explained that what she was hearing from her grandson was his unhappiness at being in recovery and away from home. He had never been on his own. He’d never supported himself.  His reaction is understandable.

I also welcomed her to fly out and make a surprise visit to any of our facilities. We’ll be happy to show her inspection reports, health department licenses, fire permits - whatever she wants to see. The conditions she describes are a figment of her grandson’s imagination.

I also explained that my office is in same facility where her grandson is housed – that I’m on-site nearly every day.

But what her grandson is going through is normal for addicts not yet into recovery. When they’re having a hard time they lash out at those who are trying to help them. 

They never look in the mirror to see the real source of their problems.